Weekending Recap + Comparing Ourselves to Other Runners!

Brooke was the only person awake when I was leaving for my run so she asked to come with me on her bike.

I told Brooke to tell me when she was ready to be done and we could just have Andrew pick us up but she didn’t run out of energy and I was the one to be done first:). 7 miles @ 9:32 pace.

We found a little fairy home while we were out.

IMG 9136

We came home and had breakfast and then we went to Andrew’s aunt’s pool in the mountains.  The kids were obsessed with the fact that you could swim from an indoor pool to an outdoor pool.  I was obsessed with the fact that it was a lot cooler where she lives vs where we live.

IMG 9164

The kids then spent hours in her playroom and were quite disappointed when we had to leave.

IMG 9173

On the way out we passed by the Heber Valley Artisan Cheese store and decided last second that we needed to bring home some items from the store.  We learned quickly that this store is a Heber MUST if you are ever there.  Their cheese is unreal.

IMG 9175

As soon as I finished my first grilled cheese sandwich I asked Andrew if he could turn the car around to get me another sandwich.

It was literally the best tasting thing I’ve had my entire pregnancy.  I have a feeling we will be back there this week.

IMG 9179

Andrew went out for a run on Saturday night at 11 pm and he learned the hard way that eating sour gummy worms as you are walking out the door for a run doesn’t feel very good during the run.  He is still running but not doing long runs anymore (his marathon was cancelled) and biking a whole lot more.

IMG 2246

We had our first week back to church.  The meeting was 30 minutes long with everybody wearing masks and sitting rows apart from the other few  families there were there.

IMG 9192

We were even ten minutes early which just goes to show how much we’ve missed it.

IMG 9207

————————————————————————————————————————–

I received this email the other day and jumped on the idea to make it a future post topic because I would LOVE to hear what you do to avoid this struggle.  We can help each other and this internet friend:

Screen Shot 2020 08 21 at 2 50 41 PM

I think this is something that 99.9% of us have experienced or experience now and so I’ll share what helps me to avoid comparing myself to other runners:

*As runners we know better than anyone that we all have good days and bad days out there!  It’s a waste of time to compare ourselves to another runner because maybe they are having the fastest day of their lives or maybe you are in a different part of your cycle where your hormones aren’t helping matters or maybe you are doing back to back races and your legs are starting the race tired, maybe the person you are comparing yourself to is able to get double the amount of sleep you get due to your stage of life etc.  We all have different stories, backgrounds and histories and you are there to prove to yourself that you are doing the best YOU can do.

*I like to think of it this way—> When I go into a race I want to use every ounce of mental and physical energy to do my best out there.  Spending time comparing myself to the people around me takes from that energy and I can’t lose that energy because I need that energy to hit my dream paces.

*Two pictures from STRONG that I love.  If I know anything about runners, I know that runners know how to work.  The mental training of running takes a lot of work but it is worthwhile in making your running more enjoyable and helping you to reach your goals.  My favorite mental training books/podcasts are HERE!

IMG 9118

IMG 9119

*Just the other day I was on IG and saw a girl that was at the same point I am in with her pregnancy and she was running minutes per mile faster than I am running right now.  I went from my current thoughts of ‘HOLY COW Janae, you are rocking this pregnant running thing’ to ‘why is my body running slower than hers and how come I can’t do that?’ My mood instantly changed and I felt so down.  Like anything in life, I really don’t feel like we have control over the first thoughts that pop into our heads BUT we have all of the control in the world of whether we continue to think that way or change our thoughts after that first thought.  I then decided my second thought about the situation was to think about how what somebody else is doing doesn’t not change or diminish what I am doing.  We are all on our own paths/journeys and somebody else’s success doesn’t take away from mine.  It felt so much better to think, ‘awesome girl, you are on fire’ and to cheer her on than to take myself down.

*The people in your world that love you, love you for who you are… not for how you compare to other runners.  Take the pressure off of yourself.  We do this because it’s ‘fun’ and maybe we should take a break from it if we are losing the fun aspect?!

*I remind myself to stay in my own lane… I’ve learned life is much more enjoyable that way.

*Get off of social media if this is really effecting you.  Social media is fabulous in so many ways but I also see how it can really be hard (after my divorce I peaced out on social media for a while because I was constantly comparing my singleness to everyone’s ‘happy familyness’ and it really helped me to stop comparing).

*Ask yourself… ‘Is the way that I am talking to myself the way I would talk to my best friend or a young girl?’   Sometimes when I am having negative thoughts about myself I tell myself it is time to talk to myself the way I talk to Brooke.  Encourage, build, lift and EMPOWER the people you love and that includes yourself.

IMG 4886

*Remind yourself over and over again that comparing yourself is only going to take you further away from your goals, not closer.  Not only does it rob you of JOY but our mental game is huge in a race and if we are thinking negative thoughts about ourselves, there is no way we will hit our potential.

*We all belong.  Every. Single. One. Of. Us.  Please don’t ever forget this.

*If you are in a race and comparing yourself to people around you and what they are doing, ask yourself the question, “Am I doing the best I can do in this moment.”  Refocus your thoughts on you and what you are doing.  Put on those blinders and move forward in your journey!  All that matters is that you are doing the best that you can do.

*Many times my main goal is to hit a certain time on the clock but I also will go into races wanting to place or get in the top 10 etc if it is a local race… so is that comparing myself to others?  I don’t think so because no matter what happens out there on the course, it doesn’t change my worth.  Who I am is who I am and the people I am racing against… that is SO out of my control.  I can’t control how many miles they have run, who their coach is, who shows up on race day or what their strengths are.  As long as I leave the race knowing I gave what I have, I’m a happy camper.

*This is a random tidbit that I think goes along with this—> 2019 was such a year of growth for my running and my brain.  One of the biggest things that was proven to me over and over again is THE POWER OF WOMEN WORKING TOGETHER.  Emilee and I could have absolutely spent our time comparing ourselves to the other person and that would have driven quite the wedge in our friendship and our training (and I’ve seen this happen in so many different training groups/partners)… BUT we saw what crazy things can happen (hitting race PRs in every distance in one year) when you work together to make the other person stronger while you get stronger too.  Her success felt like my successes and vis versa.  In work, in running, in life, in everything… I want to choose to see opportunities as an ‘all you can eat buffet’… There is more than enough goodness for everyone at the top.  The more women that rise, the better because it then in turn inspires us to rise with them and to lift up others on our way up in the world!

DSC01443

————————————————————————————————————————–

How do you avoid comparing yourself to other runners?  Has this ever been a problem for you?  

Tell me about the best part of your weekend!

Food or meal that you’ve eaten right before a run that you learned the hard way is not the best thing for you to eat before a run?

Who was the last person that you went out on a run with?

You May Also Like

28 comments

Reply

One thing I do that helps me to stop the comparison trap with other runners is think of all the stresses in my life and how the chance of that person dealing with the exact same things in the exact same way is small. That probably sounds counter intuitive but everyone is dealing with something and I would say the majority of people aren’t shouting it from the rooftops on social media!

This food combo wasn’t right before a run but it was the night before a long run. I had sushi and potentially one too many glasses of wine before an early morning summer long run during marathon training. At the time I was new to eating sushi and something made my stomach feel so off. I maybe made it a mile before turning around and saying it’s wasn’t going to happen.

One of the good things about this weekend was I bought my first Christmas gift! Yes I’m well aware that it’s early but it’s something from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale and I’m a sucker for a good deal so I had to

Reply

I t is easy to compare. Because there are no races this year and there are more demands in my life I am not running the times I used to. I did the virtual seawheeze half the other day and it was 20 plus linutes slower than my pb. I had to remind myself that it wasn’t a race this year and to have fun. When we get back to racing I can set new time goals lol.

The best part of the weekend apart from my long run/non race was our locals farmer market and sleepng in and spending time with puppy and my guy.

I once had a frozej chocolate blended coffee drink before hiol repeats. That was not good lil.

Andrew’s aunts pool looks amazing! Glad you were able to go back to your church. Have a wonderful day Janae!

Reply

I am SO glad you reminded yourself that this year is about having fun and virtual races are about a million times harder than doing them at the actual race. I agree with you and I think we also forget how much all of the stress from this year is impacting us all… it makes a big difference in our running. That sleeping in + farmers market sounds like the perfect morning. Thank you Kristine and I hope you have a beautiful morning.

Reply

Oh I love what you do Maureen to avoid comparison traps with other runners. It really is SO true and so important to remember. Oh I can totally see how that combo did not feel great the next morning on the run. I love that you start your Christmas shopping early, that sale is amazing and you just can’t say no! Have a beautiful day friend.

Reply

Such a great post to read!! I have been feeling down/comparing my running to where I was 2 years ago, and it’s not helping at all, obviously…. This year has been so strange. I need to remember that 2 years ago was so completely different. Thank you for sharing this today 😊
Oh I agree with Maureen! I love sushi, but sushi before a long run… Not such a great idea. I also once had McDonald’s hash browns before a fast 5K and that was not a good idea either! Stick to what you know works for sure! Even if it’s boring.
Here’s to a good happy week of running and school!! Have a good Monday.

Reply

Oh Wendy, that is so so hard. I definitely go through times like that with my running too. I hope on your next run you are able to see how incredible you are. Sushi before a long run… yeah, that sounds terrible and I can see how those hash browns before a run didn’t feel great either. Thanks Wendy, happy week to you too!

Reply

Two things.

*I remind myself to stay in my own lane… I’ve learned life is much more enjoyable that way.
*We all belong. Every. Single. One. Of. Us. Please don’t ever forget this.

I. LOVE. THESE. Also, when behind someone in a race, I remind myself that they are in front of me because they are in a different place in life than I am, and that my body is covering the same roads theirs is. As a runner who is not super-fast, I just remind myself in race settings that I am getting more for my money than someone faster. =)

Reply

Oh I LOVE your tips so so much and that one about getting more for your money is perfect:). Thanks for sharing friend and I hope you have a fabulous Monday!

Reply

I just love your final comments about women rising up together. So true! Thanks for all the tips to help avoid comparisons. Running has gone out the window this week because of our horrible air quality due to wildfire smoke. My husband and I took a great backpacking trip in Wyoming and I was hoping to keep up the levels of activity, but instead I’m only spending a bit of time outside in the garden (It’s also really hot) and trying to motivate to lift some weights in our basement. If you have any tips for getting excercise when the air quality is poor, let me know!

Reply

Thank you so much Hillary! It’s amazing what we can do together. That is a great question and it’s so hard when our motivation to move is to be able to be out in nature… I hope that your gardening and weights go well. I’ll think of some tips and I hope that the air gets better and these fires end asap! Hope you have a beautiful day.

Reply

Hi Hillary – smoke is bad in our area too and I’ve been doing pilates, barre and yoga videos and foam rolling like a boss. I figure I will at least get in some strength and stretching while cardio isn’t really an option. I also have my running stuff laid out and ready in case we get a change in wind and can get in a quick run. We’ve been lucky to have a few windows of clear skies, but for so many I know it’s been relentless and awful. I’m so heartbroken for those that have lost homes.

Reply

Smoked kippers for breakfast before a HM. They were on the menu as a local delicacy at the lovely B&B where we stayed, so I felt I had to try them… Never again. I managed to hang on to the contents of my stomach, but it was a close call! :D Pre-race breakfasts in hotels etc. in the UK can be a challenge because of all the fried stuff they have here.

Reply

Oh I bet that was ROUGH (I had to google them because I had never heard of them)! You must have to just bring your own things now when you have to have a pre-race breakfast in a hotel! Have a beautiful day Silke.

Reply

LOL – I thought you might have to google that; British cuisine can be quite peculiar. Well, now you know never to try them… My other big mistake was Käsespätzle (https://www.daringgourmet.com/kaesespaetzle-swabian-german-macaroni-and-cheese/) for dinner the night before a run in 90-degree heat in Hamburg. Now these you should definitely try, although maybe NOT before a run! (A bit like mac & cheese but better – good comfort eating.)

You have a good day too and all the very best wishes for the final trimester of your pregnancy! I always enjoy dipping into your blog and following you on your journey through life.

Reply

This may not be helpful but if I find myself comparing myself to other runners I choose instead to think about all the people who don’t run, and about how I am out running / racing which is an achievement in itself!

My favourite parts of the weekend were camping in the backyard, which is a lot easier than packing up the car it turns out, and going to all you can eat sushi and having a delicious meal with zero sushi :) (32 weeks pregnant).

I’m glad you were able to get back to church Janae, I’m sure that was a special moment for you!

Reply

Oh that is a great thing to do Pam! It reminds you that you are amazing and out there doing something so admirable. I love it. YAY for camping in the backyard! You are getting so close and please keep me updated on how you are doing. Thank you so much friend, it sure was!

Reply

Hi Janae! Great post today! I’m reminded of the book The Passion Paradox and what it says about doing your passion for yourself and your own feeling of achievement instead of comparing to others. If you are doing your passion for external validation you will burn out!
Happy Monday!

Reply

Oh I love that so much Amy… so so true and thanks for reminding us of that! Happy Monday to you too and thanks for sharing!

Reply

Ahhh this helped SO much! Thank you for writing this post!!! I am going to read this over and over again between now and my marathon next month :)

I’ve made a lot of food mistakes! I run first thing in the morning so it’s usually dinner the night before. I will never eat Chipotle or spicy food the night before a workout or long run!

Reply

I am SO so glad Taylor and PLEASE let me know how your marathon goes next month! I’m cheering for you big time. Good thinking on avoiding Chipotle or spicy food the night before… I’ll join you in that. Hope your day is a great one!

Reply

Thank you so much!! :)

Reply

PREACH!! “Encourage, build, lift and EMPOWER the people you love and that includes yourself.” <– that gave me chills! it is so so true. In races I just try to think about other people the same way about life – we are all trying our best and there is enough for everyone to succeed (the abundance mindset). We don't know where someone came from, where they started, what they've been through so when we are running next to people in races just remember there is so much we don't see!

Reply

Oh I am so so glad Erika! Thank you for sharing and reminding me that there is so much we don’t see. I hope you are having a great night.

Reply

My 2020 Instagram strategy is to remove anything that makes me feel “less than” and to fill it with things that bring me joy. So – no more super fast and svelte triathletes, no “influencers” .. but lots of real people. Regular age group athletes, Leslie Jordan (he’s from my part of the world, and listening to him reminds me of some dearly loved family members), and lots and lots of vegetable garden photos. Tomatoes feature prominently on my feed right now. And collard greens. Global Positive News is great too!

Reply

I love your IG strategy SO so much Amy! I think that is such a healthy way to consume social media. I need to follow these tomato photos because I want to eat tomatoes all day long right now:). I hope you have a beautiful evening Amy!

Reply

Sometimes if I catch myself comparing I will say Thank you Ms. X for helping me dream big, reach my potential, be my best self. I reflect on the idea that if all comparison goes away what if some motivation and drive does too?

Reply

The last person I went on a run with was my hubby, I make him push the double stroller to slow him down ;)

I bought Emmy that same yellow jumper from Cat n Jack that Skye has on, I think they would be besties!

Reply

Love all of these tips about avoiding the comparison trap! One thing that I learned was from an experience I had while running a small local 4 mile race.
I had been running (and improving) for years at that point. And it wasn’t my first race. I had run mostly marathons or halves so the distance of 4 miles was something that I knew I could tackle easily.
As we were waiting to start, I was standing next to a group of three or four runners with wiry, fit bodies, the skimpiest gear…they looked like pro athletes. I felt completely out of my league.
One of the women turned to her friend and says it hope ‘I can finish…I’ve never run more than 3 miles!’
In that second, I smiled and thought ‘yeah, I got this.’ It instantly reminded me that you cannot judge a book by its cover. Like you said, stay in your lane…because only you know that every time you lace up, you are putting in the work and whether that means you run x amount of miles or push yourself to run as fast as you can…that is YOUR yardstick of measure.

Leave a Reply to Erika Cancel Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *