17 WEEKS (well, on Friday but I like to post these updates on Wednesday:)!!! Time is going by a little bit faster than it was in that first trimester (where each day actually felt like 5 days) and before you know it… we will be half-way there!
A few things about this last week of pregnancy:
*Sleeping on my stomach has come to an end. I have to say goodbye to my favorite sleeping position for a few months because it just isn’t comfortable anymore. Any good pillow recommendations? I need something for laying on my side!
*37 miles last week! Some on the treadmill, some in Park City and some around town. I think the treadmill will become more and more frequent in the next few months due to my bladder:)
*According to the internet (because the internet is always right), the baby now weighs 5 ounces and is the size of a pomegranate!
*Cereal suddenly doesn’t sound as good as it was (aka I probably overate it) but fresh fruit and mexican food still have my whole heart. Hot dogs have randomly made an appearance in my life with this pregnancy.
*I AM ALWAYS HUNGRY. The other day I told Andrew after eating a foot long chicken subway that I was starving again about 20 minutes later.
*I am positive I snore even louder than I did before… it wakes me up throughout the night ha.
*My chest no longer hurts but I had to go to the store and buy quite a different size bra than I normally buy;)
*No more morning sickness nausea but plenty of heart burn.. I still would choose heart burn over nausea any day though.
*I get up usually 2 times a night to use the restroom. Thank goodness I fall back asleep easily!
*WATER TASTES AMAZING AGAIN. Hallelujah. A big cup of ice water (80% ice please) sounds so good at all times. That was a rough few weeks of forcing myself to drink water.
*The kids still talk, pray for and ask about the baby each day! We are all going to a doctor’s appointment today together!
Honestly, breastfeeding has been something that has stressed me out a little bit from the very first day I found out I was pregnant. If you remember (I talk all about my experience HERE with breastfeeding and Brooke), I didn’t last long with breastfeeding with Brooke. For some reason I just could not get her to latch properly and so I tried pumping. She went crazy for the bottle and I just continued to pump everything. After a few months I lost my milk completely and I felt awful.
I felt like I completely failed in the nutrition department for Brooke. Also, formula was very expensive during a time where money was beyond tight and I felt like I must have been missing out on the bonding experience that occurs for a lot of women and their baby when they breastfeed. It’s silly, but I even get a little emotional just typing this out and thinking about it (then again, pretty much anything could make me cry right now). I just remember breastfeeding being such a hard experience for me and feeling like I was so alone in my experience because I just assumed it was so easy for everybody else.
SO you can imagine my mini anxiety when I think about it now… how is it going to work out this next time? Am I going to be a stress case again during those months of breastfeeding like I was for Brooke? Am I going to be constantly worried about drying up again? I’m sure I will a little bit but my I have gained a little perspective in this whole situation.
IT DOESN’T MATTER. All that matters is that I love this little one coming to me like crazy and do whatever I can to help him/her grow, learn and love.
I have actual PROOF that bonds between a mother and a child are more than okay if breastfeeding doesn’t work out… Breastfeeding didn’t work for Brooke and I and I think she and I have quite the amazing relationship. She is smart, talented, wonderful, kind and every other amazing adjective I can think of and she didn’t breastfeed/drink breast milk for long.
So what is my decision on breastfeeding this time around?
I’m going to try my hardest and be okay with whatever the outcome. I think a happy (non-stressed/worried/freaking out about breastfeeding) mom is probably the most important variable in this situation for us.
I am very hopeful that it will be a much better experience this time around too. Andrew is the best support system I could ever imagine (he actually just took a class for school all about breastfeeding so that is beyond nice too). I also live near my family this time. I felt like I had no one to reach out to when I needed help with this kind of stuff when I lived in California and this time I have all the help I could imagine. My life is much different now than it was when Brooke was a baby. My last reason that I’m hopeful I will be able to breastfeed for longer… I won’t be jumping back into running this time as crazy as I did with Brooke (i.e. running a 1:31 1/2 marathon when she was 6 weeks old). I do not blame running as a reason that my milk supply eventually disappeared (I think that pumping exclusively may have played a part of that) but I do think that this time I will not be running as much and I’ll focus WAY MORE on my hydration and calories each day which should help. I know plenty of women that run and keep a great milk supply, I just need to do my research a bit more this time.
I’m going to do my best but if breastfeeding doesn’t work again, I’ve got the proof that everything will work out more than okay so I can relax:) There are so many beautiful things in life to focus on and I’m sure I’ve got some mama strengths that I could focus on more than feeling bad about not being the perfect breastfeeding mom. I’ll do my best and let go of the things out of my control.
I would love to hear your breastfeeding experience!!
What about any good books/blogs/resources about breastfeeding? Any tips that you’ve learned to help me out in this department?
How was the second trimester for you if you have had kids?