Another Sunday that of course started with…
waffles. We tried another recipe and it was a great one… really, you can’t go wrong with a carb topped with strawberries and syrup though:)
Beretta always sits there so patiently hoping that some food will accidentally be spilled.
Brooke had her first experience of stapling things together with me which was a huge highlight from the day.
Andrew pulled out this… I can’t.
He is starting Brooke early on the Angels love:)
We had a family dinner together at my sister’s house and it was packed with veggies. My sister made this huge stir-fry with a sauce made of soy sauce, chicken broth, garlic and ginger. We put it on top of brown rice and had we brought a salad for the side.
For dessert—> strawberries. As a family we are really trying to start having very healthy Sunday dinners together now and yesterday was a success.
He’s requesting me to give him ‘knuckles.’
I came across this draft of a post that I started a few months ago but never finished. It is still a constant on my brain and I would love to take some time to discuss it if that’s okay:
Let’s talk about a subject that I need your help on. A subject that I think about (sometimes obsessively). Something in my life that I worry a lot about (my mom suggested that she and I start a company where people hire us to worry about things for them because we are quite the professionals) and find myself tearing up the second I imagine me doing this whole thing wrong is the topic. A topic that I want to discuss with you to hear your ideas, point of view and stories.
Over the years, I have thought a lot about what things led me into my eating disorder and low self-esteem world that I lived in for many years. Was it the media, my perfectionist habits? Was it my way of coping with things that were rough or some poor decisions that I made during my college years that led to feeling bad about myself? Seeing friends around me struggling with eating disorders, was that it? I don’t really know the answer and sometimes I think we go through things just because we’ve got bigger lessons to learn BUT I want to make sure that I am doing things now to help the young girls in my life to feel confident and to love their bodies. So I’ve been spending time really trying to critically think about how I can do the best I can with this subject for Brooke and any other young girls that I might have an influence over.
About a year and a half years ago, I distinctly remember a conversation that was going on with a few girls in a hallway right next to a room with Brooke in it. The conversation started off innocently and then led to talking about things they wanted to change about themselves, how much weight they wanted to lose and how unhappy they were with their bodies.
After a few minutes of listening, I remember thinking about how Brooke was in the next room over. Yes, she was very young at the time but I just couldn’t bare the thought of her hearing this type of conversation and growing up thinking that these thoughts about ourselves are normal. I explained my feelings to the group I was talking with and it stopped immediately, everyone was very understanding. I decided that this was just not going to be a thing in my home. I decided at that moment that Brooke was not going to hear me say negative things about my body (which doesn’t mean I don’t have days where I think them…). I don’t remember one time hearing my mom talk negatively about her body as I was growing up and I decided I wanted to be just like her (for the 1 millionth reason). I want (key word want… I’m always a work in progress over here) Brooke to grow up with a mom that eats well (and that includes treats IMO), talks positively about herself, exercises because she loves her body and a mom that can teach her that her worth has nothing to do with her weight. That she is a daughter of God that has infinite worth.
I know that we can’t protect our kids from everything (even though I wish we could) but there are things in our control that we can do to help our girls and boys grow up to be confident in themselves. I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Also, I talk a lot about some of the things I want to focus on with our kids in this post about self-worth —> I strongly believe our integrity, service, faith/hope, smart decisions, physical health, talents and skills/accomplishments help shape the way we think about ourselves.
A few of the things that I believe I can do to help establish a healthy mindset in terms of exercise and food:
*Teach these kids to exercise because they love their bodies and as a way to take good care of their bodies. That our overall health (physically and mentally) benefit from exercise and that it isn’t about the calorie burn.
*I think kids pick up even on the way we look at ourselves in a mirror, let alone the things we say when we see ourselves. They can tell if we are disappointed, frustrated, annoyed etc. when we see our image and I sure don’t want them doing the same.
* I don’t think that if I am perfect at talking positively about my body that my kids will automatically have an amazing body image BUT I do think that if I am constantly picking myself apart in front of them that the odds are higher that my kids will pick up the same habits from me.
*Focus our compliments on non-physical things. I want our kids to see all of the amazing things about them.
*As you know, I refuse to go down the diet road because I don’t even want to come close to where I was 6ish years ago. Each of us has our own things going on with what works best for us food/exercise wise but I can’t imagine that extreme dieting or talking about these things in front of them can be helpful for our young girls. Example is everything and I think if we don’t want our kids to do something (now or later on in life).. we probably shouldn’t ourselves.
*And a whole lot of thoughts jumbled into one point that probably doesn’t make a lot of sense but I just hope I can teach them how to cope with life in healthy ways. Love them for who they are, no matter what. Build a relationship with them where they feel they can tell us everything. Build a trusting and open relationship (easier said than done right?!). Teach them that failure is a part of life, a learning experience and to focus on effort. I want to be highly supportive to help them feel like they can do things and help them to feel capable in their own worlds. Do what I can to help them feel loved.
What do you do in your world to help establish healthy self-esteems in your children?
How do you think we can teach our young girls self-love, a healthy outlook on food and exercise? Have any books/resources that you recommend about it?
What helped you growing up to build a healthy self image? What did not help?
What was the best part of your weekend? Have a good run? Eat something delicious?