What we’ve learned in the first month of marriage and I couldn’t turn it down.

We have made it over a month now!  We are pretty much marriage experts right now so I thought we would share a some of the things we’ve learned this month about marriage and each other.

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*I love having my best friend with me.  (-Andrew)

*Renovating an entire house in your first month of marriage may not have been our brightest idea.  We’ve learned that we need to pace ourselves a bit more when it comes to projects (-both of us)

*Andrew takes a minute or two (or more;) to wake up in the morning, and I am wide awake and talking a million words per minute first thing in the morning.  (-Janae)

*I’m literally more than happy just staying home all night long with this little crew than doing anything else on the planet. (-Janae)

*Even after going through a divorce and being scared to trust someone fully again, I find it easier than I ever thought it would be with Janae (-Andrew).

*This is whole marriage/the way Andrew treats me/best friend thing is already so beyond different than anything I have ever known before  (-Janae)

*Janae snores (-Andrew)

*Sometimes Andrew sleep walks and one time he walked to get graham crackers and ate them in bed all while he was asleep (-Janae).

*I am actually quite amazed how much my priorities have shifted since we got married… hanging out together trumps everything else for me.  (-Janae)

*Andrew gives me a big head… the second I’m feeling like I’m failing at something he is there to pick me right up and feel like a million bucks.  (-Janae)

*I feel like we are eating healthier now that we are all in a home together (still with some treats… umm cookies below).  Feeling like I’m in charge of a family’s food has me going to the store to pick up all of the fresh produce possible.  (-Janae)

*Andrew and I say every night that we are going to go to bed EARLY but then find ourselves still talking and laughing at 2 a.m.  Totally worth it even though the next day at about 3 p.m. I feel like I’m ready to go to bed for the day (-Janae)

*Andrew is beyond ticklish.  Like to the point that if I even hold my hand near him as I’m telling him I am going to tickle him—> he starts laughing uncontrollably.  (-Janae)

*Andrew showed me the coolest quote ever and it is something I constantly want to remember—> “It’s not what did I do to deserve you? It’s what am I going to do to make sure you feel the same way tomorrow?”  (-Janae)

*I don’t like sharing a closet with a girl (-Andrew)…. Okay, Janae here now… don’t you guys agree that I should have 75% of the closet?

*I’ve never met someone so OCD about keeping their kitchen clean (-Andrew)

*There is nothing Andrew hates more than dancing… and I love it… he’ll change;)  (-Janae)

*Blending a family is hard but there are a lot of awesome rewards to it. (-Andrew)

*We eat all of the same foods.  It’s almost weird how similar we are with a lot of things like that. (-Janae)

*Andrew REALLY loves his dog.  It’s incredibly sweet.  Beretta is most definitely a member of the family. (-Janae)

*We are really competitive with each other with stupid little games—> for example gummy tower building, guessing the total bill at the grocery store, random/useless trivia… it’s fun.  I also really love scaring her (-Andrew)

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Let’s talk about yesterday’s activities now shall we?  

I was back at the gym again (my treadmill isn’t set up yet because of the move) and I ran on the same treadmill there that I’ve put hundreds of miles on over the years.  I had time for exactly 6.3 miles and today I am doing my long run with the girls (outside + early + sore legs still from boot camp + lots of laughing along the way = it should be a good time).

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By the way, while I was in Eugene, Brooks analyzed my running form on one of their treadmills.  One thing the guy said was that I run too close to the little bar on the treadmill.  I don’t know how to break this habit, I’m afraid I’m going to fall off the back of the thing whenever I do try to scoot back a little bit.  Anyone else have this problem?  

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Then it was off to run a bunch of errands with the kiddos.  They make Target even more exciting for me.

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A quick lunch of turkey burger and veggies (followed by an ab & j sandwich because I was still hungry) eaten with a very organized kitchen floor behind me;)

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$1 at Target provided these two a solid 45 minutes of entertainment.

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We also made it up to the mountains to get in some exploring yesterday.  Something about these mountains…

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I am very grateful that Andrew still loves to grill even when it is still 90 degrees outside.  We topped our chicken with pesto and it was superb (I don’t think I’ve used that word since 9th grade).

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Chicken, baked sweet potatoes smothered in coconut oil and then cooked wrapped in foil and then some watermelon.

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Brooke found all of our cookie cutters yesterday and when she asked to make cookies together I couldn’t say no. 

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She’s getting pretty good at it… I think baking together will always be one of our things. 

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Lately the car has been putting Brooke right to sleep.  In about three seconds she goes from talking non-stop to lights out.

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BE HAPPY GO RUNNING TANKS —>  you know you want one!!!

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Last type of cookies that you made?  

Things you’ve recently learned from a relationship of yours?

Random question—>  but what percentage of the time do you feel a runner’s/endorphin high after your runs?

Day off before or after a long run?  Do you run the day before and after a long run?

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71 comments

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Is it weird that I always feel a runners high to some degree?

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Last type of cookies were no bake cookies — because I didn’t want to turn on the oven but I was craving the PB and chocolate goodness.

Recently, I’ve learned that my hubby and I think alike–it’s like we have our own secret meaningful looks where we don’t even need to be close by but we know what each other’s thinking… it’s kinda awesome!

I feel the runner’s high usually towards the mid/end of my run — it’s not in the beginning, for sure! No matter how many times I lace up and run, that first mile or so is a liar!

Always a day off before a long run and a day off after a long run — well at least a day off of no running, but probably cross training, strength training, or yoga…

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Those cookies look so good right now! I made snickerdoodle cookies last week, and those sound really good right now, too. Clearly I need cookies pronto.

I guess I get a runner’s high often–I mean, I always feel so much better after getting a run in. It helps calm me down and forget about stress and simply escape into a world I love for a little bit.

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I DEFINITELY have the same problem of running too close to the bar on the treadmill. Sometimes when I am doing my easy runs I will run a little bit too fast and actually run into the bar! haha. I don’t think I will ever be able to break this habit because like you I am convinced at any second I am about to fall off the back of the treadmill so I better stay as close to the front as possible! :D

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I love all of the things you learned -especially eating graham crackers in bed! haha One of the biggest things I’ve learned that seems so simple to say- is to love and respect each other. If you make an effort to think/act that way when your in a situation where you might not necessarily want to, it really can go a long way and change the direction of a relationship in a good way. :)

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I usually rest the day after a long run but I’m trying a different rest days now (between my two hard workouts).
The last type of cookies I baked were chocolate chip.

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i loved reading your snippets about your first month of marriage!! I don’t think you guys should feel any regret for the house projects… My experience is that it’s better to do them and have them done so you can focus on enjoying your family as it grows!!! :)

Just a short run before a long run keeps me in running mode but doesn’t stress my body enough to prevent me from having a good run.

Have an awesome day janae!

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We typically run 7 days/week in peak training and then take a full day off about once every 3 weeks. This only works for us if we run SUPER easy on our easy days.

We are still in recovery mode, so just some walk/easy running today.

I haven’t baked cookies in about 5 years, but you all make it look so fun!

Every ultra race we do together, we come out feeling like our relationship has grown stronger and deeper. We definitely feel that patience is KEY to a good marriage…and DO NOT KEEP SCORE. PERIOD. About anything. Just don’t do it.

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I’ve been making a small batch of vegan sugar cookies every night these past couple of nights and I’m not even a little sorry about it. Cookies over everything always.

I usually try to not run the day before or after a long run, but will do some form of cross training. I like to make sure I’m saving my legs for those runs so that they won’t feel too disastrous haha. plus, if I run too often, I tend to feel burned out on it, so I like to only keep it to about four times a week.

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Thank you for sharing so much of your marriage – you two are an amazing example to me of what kind of relationship to look for! And I’m pretty sure I would love Beretta beyond words if I met her, any big dog that loves kids is the best.

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This was such a fun read. I am the same way and wide awake first thing in the morning. I’m not ready to run but I am wide awake.

I actually run super close to the bar on the treadmill. I am terrified to fall off…I always thought it might be because I’m running too easy but I’m more scared to push myself on the machine.

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I am very bad at making cookies, so we only make them for Christmas time. Even though I follow the recipe completely, they just never turn out correct! Hmmmm, I have been married for almost 24 years and I guess the thing I’ve learned about marriage (especially since having kids) is that it’s all about teamwork and communication. You can have it all, but you have to make sure you both agree on the plan to how to get it!

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Love all the little things you have learned so far and yes, girls should get 75% of the closet. When I run on the treadmill, I typically stay in the middle but I did fall off once. The power went out and I went flying. I’m sure it was a sight to see. We have been on vacation, so I haven’t baked in awhile. Cake sounds yummy! I usually take my rest day after a long run.

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Have you ever made your own pesto? I use spinach with basil. It tastes the same, but gets those dark leafy greens in my diet!

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OH. MY. GOSH. Every time at Orange Theory I get told by the trainer that I am WAY too close to the front of the treadmill! He freaks out that I’m going to touch the front with my feet haha. Oops? When I was on a cruise for a week, sometimes you can feel the waves, and everytime we hit one I would go slamming into the front of the treadmill. Lesson learned for sure.

And I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year now. I’ve always been very self-concious, insecure and really hard on myself. He allows me to live day by day and tells me all the time that he loves me for me and even my insecurities. This has made me love myself so much more! He’s definitely a winner :)

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You guys remind me of when we got married 13 years ago! So sweet! The little moments when we laugh together or take time to share dinner are the best. It’s easy to get caught in the stress of life but having your best friend at your side makes such a big difference! Wishing you all the best!

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The last cookies I made were chocolate chip cookies – the soft and chewy kind. Delicious!

Whenever my boyfriend and I make dinner we do things differently. It’s funny how when you don’t live with someone they do things completely differently in the kitchen.

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I had kind of a crazy run on Saturday, it ended up being too hot to run outside so I went to the gym, where I had to use three different treadmills to find the right one…reason, my bump kept hitting the stop button! I also run way too close to the bar, but I also have that weird fear of falling off lol.
I love the sweet things you’ve learned about each other. It’s always so different living with someone than just dating them. I remember getting annoyed that my husband seemed to spend every waking hour on points and deals websites. Annoyed until he started getting amazing deals on things like…Manolos. ;-)

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I don’t really notice the runner’s high unless I do a harder effort run. However, I definitely DO notice if I DON’T run. Hello, cranky city. I usually run easy the day before and after my long runs, but I think everyone is different. It’s about finding what works best for you :) Relationships are a constant state of learning I feel like! I’ve learned that communication is key. I used to want my husband to magically know what I wanted and what I was feeling, but vocalizing the expectations and feelings will get you a much better result!

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Things I’ve learned from the relationship I’m in … 1.) You can never compare your relationship to other people’s … 2.) Fighting is okay as long as you’re able to communicate and resolve it appropriately 3.) If the dog likes him, they’re probably a good person :)

Last type of cookies I baked – Oatmeal chocolate chip butterscotch bars. YUM!

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Haha, I love the picture of your lunch yesterday how Beretta is totally waiting to see if any food falls. Adorable.

My relationship is definitely similar to some things that you’ve said. It’s nothing I’ve ever had before, he’s my best friend, and we support each other fully. I LOVE that quote that Andrew found. Definitely noting that down.

Always day off before my long runs. I like to do a short run the day after for now, so my legs get used to running on tired legs! I am training for my first half marathon!

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I totally love this post. So happy for you!

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I always feel a runner’s high after I am done running. That is what keeps me running day after day. One thing I have learned recently in my marriage is that it is important to never get too comfortable. We have to keep putting in the extra effort day after day to keep our marriage exciting!

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The last cookies I made were lemon cake mix cookies for my friend’s birthday. These are her absolute favorite and she asks me to make them for her every year. Right now, it’s just too hot to use my oven. I might cave in and bake some brownies this weekend. I’ve been craving them soooo bad.

I always feel pretty good after a run. If I’m thinking about skipping because I feel a little off, I tell myself I’ll warm up and if I still feel bad I can quit. This has never happened :)

I usually run easy on the treadmill the day before a long run. I take a rest day after and try to do yoga. My day off is also the day I try to get stuff done at home…laundry, cleaning, organizing, etc

Have a great long run Janae!! Hope you get your TM set up soon…

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I learned so much from my current relationship. My boyfriend isn’t the kind of guy to complain or vent but I love when he finally feels comfortable to do so. He thinks I’m crazy for wanting to hear him whine and complain and I think I am getting him to realize that he will feel better and I am happy to listen. That’s what relationships are. We support each other. Trust me he listens to me complain way more!

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I am really bad at planning days off- I usually just take it whenever I feel I really need it with no plan in mind. But I never run very long the day before or after a long run.
Last cookies were probably oatmeal chocolate chip.
How do you keep yourself occupied on the treadmill if you’re at a gym with no iPad or anything like that to watch what you want? I have such a hard time with this.

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Last type of cookie I made was MONSTER cookies – extra PB, raisins, chocolate chips, and since I didn’t have any M&Ms last weekend I put in Oreos instead – definitely not a bad idea! ;)

One thing I have really learned with my boyfriend is to treasure the little things that we get to enjoy together. We’ve been watching a lot of Olympics together and getting to spend that time watching these amazing women and men and laughing and enjoying each others’ company has been sweet.

I typically feel a runner’s high if I run over 3 miles – I know that sounds weird but if I run less than that I feel good but not that on-top-of-the-world feeling. Also, after a run I like to lie down with my legs up on the wall and if I do that I definitely get a runner’s high – I think it is because I reflect on my run and my running goals during that time and afterwards I am always pumped for my next run.

Day off after a long run definitely. I like to run short the day before a long run or a race even (1-2 miles only)! If I take a day off before a race then my legs feel heavy and sluggish the day of the race and then it really messes with my head.

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We play the grocery game all the time too. My husband got 10 cents off one time.

I’m making chocolate chip cookies today!

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Oh man, I haven’t made cookies in soo long! Like since winter.

I’m learning the hard way how differently some people communicate and show their love / that they care. It seems that whole love languages thing is actually super important to align in some way

I usually feel a runner’s high! The only times when I don’t are if I did a run-walk or didn’t put in enough effort in the run. I always feel so much better after a run as long as I tried!

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I just made about 30 chocolate chip cookies on Sunday. They may or may not be all gone as of last night…

I have recently learned that it’s the small things that really show each other how much you care. The big stuff is nice but small things that seem insignificant (like making a bowl of oatmeal or a cup of coffee in the morning) can really make a difference!

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I love both of your marriage points!!! So sweet!! I’ve learned changing my attitude to not stress about little sleep or the next day helps me be in a better mood which helps everyone else be in a better mood! It’s crazy how much one family member’s bad attitude rubs off on others! Last cookies were chocolate chip!

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I think I’ve learned how much it’s OK for both of us to change over the years. Neither of us are still really the people we dated but we stay connected and respect each other’s growth. In some ways we’ve grown to have very different opinions and that’s OK.

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“It’s not what did I do to deserve you… It’s what am I going to do to make sure you feel the same way tomorrow.” —-> I love this. So true.

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Love love love reading the things you’ve leaned from your first month of marriage together! So adorable. My little heart is melting over here ;)

Latest cooking baking? Zuchinni oatmeal dark chocolate chip cookies. Yes please.

Runners high? Every.single.time.

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So when I had my running analyzed (during the injury that plagues me madness) I was also told that I run to close to the bar. But if I scoot back my heart rate jumps 50% because I constantly think I am falling off. They even showed me the video after to show me how I had alltheroom and didn’t need to be worried, but the fear is still there.

It will be 12 years of Ross and I being married next month. 12 years of us saying we will go to bed earlier every night and 12 years of us staying up late to talk/ hang out instead of following through #goals

I made peanut butter toffe chocolate chip caramel bars on Monday. The pan weighs like 15lbs when you put it in the oven because there is soooo much butter, caramel, deliciousness. You would think watching all that stuff go into a bar would deter me from eating them, but it only makes me want them all the more.

Sorry Andrew, I could have told you that Janae snored #mybad

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Thank you for not telling him. TWELVE YEARS… holy cow!!! Oh we want to be just like you and keep the staying up thing forever! Those bars sound like heaven. Thanks for the snap today, made my week!

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I have to go at least 1-3 miles to get the runners high, or at least for my body to forgive me for starting the run, that’s the turning point from mad to very happy.

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I’ve been thinking of taking the day before a long run off from running instead of my usual lately of the day after! I think I run too close to the treadmill bar too!

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I loved your list. Really really great. :) This might sound like it’s backwards but my first marriage had zero conflict. Like, we never fought EVER. Growing up with two sisters that are quite a bit older than me set me up in a bit of an only-child situation so I had nobody to fight with there, either. But with Andrew? HA HA. Different story entiiiiiirely. We are best friends, but man do we ever fight. We are two very passionate people. I’m a lot stronger of a person than I used to be, and I’m getting good at conflict-resolution, but mostly I am learning that my way is NOT the only way!

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Recent thing I learned in a relationship: Let the small things go. :)

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YES YES YES YES YES!! I love it! Thanks Jessica!

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“Janae snores”
“Sometimes Andrew sleep walks and one time he walked to get graham crackers and ate them in bed all while he was asleep”

LOL! That literally made me laugh out loud. I don’t know how it actually got said but it sounded like the sleep walking was a comeback to the snoring thing and I love it! You guys are cute.

ps. girls need more closet space.

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HAHA It kind of was a comeback.. I had to have something. Thank you for agreeing, GIRLS NEED MORE CLOSET SPACE!!

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I also recently got married, bought a house, started renovating, and started a new job within the same week! It’s been stressful at times but I feel like we had a good base relationship already (been together for 4 years) so it didn’t really bother us. I can’t imagine how stressful it would be with kids and being in a new relationship! I’m so happy to hear all the sweet things about eachother though..and I love that quote from Andrew! I’m stealing it :)

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WOW, Gretchen… that sure is a lot! Congrats on all of the new changes! I want to see how your house turns out! Yep, steal that quote.. it is the best!

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I run so close to the bar on the treadmill that I like to have my tummy touching it! Weird, I know, but I think I have the same phobia you do about falling off the end. :P That being said… I run on the treadmill RARELY! #hate!
I can’t even believe this warrants a response… OF COURSE you need AT LEAST 75% of the closet!!! Duh! Andrew… #smh.

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I’m so happy for you and Brooke and your new little family-you deserve it!

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I’ve never met you, but recently relocated to Provo and I’m pretty sure I saw you and Josse running the Provo River trail this morning– I was on my road bike! I’ve been reading your blog since before I even thought I’d ever live in Utah and thought it was funny how blogs can bring strangers together. Next time I’ll say hi!

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OH MY GOODNESS!!! That is so so awesome! Yep, that was us!! You better say hi next time… or we should get a group together for froyo! I hope you are loving it in Utah so far!!!

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You two are too cute!!

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I also run too close to the front of the treadmill. I’m less worried about the bar and more worried about my foot hitting where the belt comes out. (does that make sense)?

Beretta looks like she’s hoping for some turkey burger too. ;)

I made no bake energy cookies. I had to use up some over ripe bananas and they’re really easy to make. (plus it’s too hot to put the oven on).

I used to take the day off before a long run now I run the day before and after. (or do easy elliptical miles after).

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Target dollar section for the win!

Hmm. Last cookies I made were your everything cookie recipe back on the 4th of july! They were a hit.

Relationships. Sigh. Just coming out of one where my partner of nearly 6 years found that he wasn’t sure if it was a “perfect” fit, I suppose I’ve learned that you can try your damnedest to make someone see how much you love/want them in your life, but it doesn’t always work out regardless.

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Oh Meesh, I am truly so so sorry about what you are going through right now. This breaks my heart. Have hope, there is something so great out there for you. Now that I look back on everything I realize God’s plan is perfect.

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psst… Andrew… embrace Janae’s OCD with the kitchen cleaning. Trust me on this. My hubby is OCD too and our kitchen *sparkles*. At first it was a little disturbing (for about 5 seconds) then I realized i’m the luckiest girl on the planet.

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HAHA I keep telling him he has to enjoy this problem of mine… he never has to walk into a messy kitchen. I can’t fall asleep until it is clean! So glad your hubby keeps your kitchen PERFECT:)

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I’m just like you when it comes to mornings. When my eyes open, my brain is open. I’m ready for the day. Everyone else in my family is the exact opposite, but that gives me theory of quiet mornings to myself. :) So so so so thrilled your first month is fruitful with love. You deserve it.
Regarding the treadmill, I know for a fact I’m too close to the bar too, but there is nothing anyone can say to make me change that. I’ve seen people fall off treadmills more than I wish to have been witness to such accounts, so I’m not about to change up my game.

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Love reading your blog!!

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Oh thank you!!! I hope you are having an awesome evening!

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My husband and I play a version of the grocery gsme. We guess the check total when we go out to eat.
Last cookies were shortbread with large milk chocolate chips and white chocolate chip macadamia nut -my faves!

I walk and do kettle bells the day before a long run and a shorter run the next day. My long runs are on the weekends so I have to do a long and semi long back to back because those are the only days I can run outside. Monday. I walk and do kettle bells again.

Your first month of marriage sounds like it’s been pretty awesome. I hope you have many many more!

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The mountains in your picture look beautiful! The last type of cookies I made were peanut-butter chocolate chip, all with healthier alternatives to traditional ingredients! We are all taking turns making meals/bringing dessert for a man at my work who is going through a difficult season, and cookies were the dessert I brought this week! :) Sweets are always best when you get to share them!

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I definitely require at least 75% of the closet. And drawers. I actually turned our coat closet into my triathlon/running closet because I didn’t want to store all of that stuff in our bedroom closet. Is there ever enough space? :)

Oh, I can totally relate with being uber competitive with my husband when it comes to trivial things. We both hate losing.

It sounds like your relationship is growing stronger each day and you are learning new things about one another as your lives have merged into one.

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I love baking with my 3 year old too. He loves it too because he likes licking the bowl and eating treats. But I’m not a fan of sugar cookie baking. Too much work to roll out over and over. What’s your recipe?

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HEY MARY!! Sugar cookies are a lot tougher to make… we just used this simple recipe though: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/9870/easy-sugar-cookies/

They were really delicious! Have fun baking with your little man!

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Love, love your marriage expertness. :) I just got married last month, too (the 16th), and so far it has been awesome!! Love your new last name, as well. Barron was my maiden name :)

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CONGRATS EMILY!! That is seriously so so exciting! Such a great name;)

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So has your grocery budget gone up with a family of 4 now? I know you guys are using that budget system you talked about recently. Do you set a specific grocery budget or just buy what you want. I can’t get over how much I spend at the store! And I try to look for deals and stuff but it’s expensive!

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It DEFINITELY has gone up as a family of 4! We set a grocery budget of what we think will be about what we need and we are using that as a test amount. We will adjust after we see for a month or two of what is more realistic! You are right, it gets so so expensive!

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We play the grocery store guessing game too!!!!! My husband is way better at it than I am-he usually wins…haha

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I’ve used this one for my past 7 marathon. Super light, not even aware I’m caring anything.
http://www.simplehydration.com

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Too cute! For as long as I’ve been in my current relationship (10+ years) we’ve always done grocery shopping together to make it a little less painful.

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I agree about those oreos, they seem a bit…. odd…..

So funny about Brooke & Beretta wanting a puppy sibling… she sounds like me!

I haven’t used a handheld water bottle for running yet but I want to try one out. I’ll look forward to your post about which one you get & how you like it!

Sour Patch Kitds for the win to fuel during a marathon!

Back in May, I ran a half that was SOO hot. I just made sure to hydrate, run through an sprinklers that were available and more hydrating! I’m so thankful for the community that I live in & all the support they provided that day!

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